Wednesday, February 13, 2008

One child is not enough.

This morning my tolerance level is shrinking fast. Don't confuse the following rant with an obsessive desire to overpopulate the world. Its function is to serve as an explanation for why one would have a multitude of children.

One child, especially one with lots of energy has a hard time self amusing for more than ten minutes. They demand extra reading time, your accompaniment to jump on the bed, and destroy the living room furniture. You are not only the mom, you are also the playmate, co-conspirator and all around source of human amusement.

One child is not enough. With two, there are bouts of time when you are not required, some of them even last for an entire hour. Games become cooperative. Two little brains figure out how to destroy the living room furniture and get into trouble. They feed each other ideas, energy and whatever they manage to light-finger out of the fridge. A stay at home mom can successfully accomplish the list of home making chores, un-hindered by constant interruptions, asides from yelling death threats at the thieves in training.

Ha ha ha, the mother of two, three or eighteen might laugh at my little child number obsession. Two fight, they don't play together, they require twice the time as one. Yes, I reply, but at least you have an excuse for losing patience at 10:30 in the morning.

With just one child, other mothers stare at you as if you are incompetent. Maybe their first child was eager to please, low energy and easily amused. Mine is perusing a French comic book, in between attacking a chair with soap and raiding my purse for credit cards and coins "for piggie". My daycare lady won't even take her, unless there are other small children present to provide a buffer. The only people who think she acts normally are her grandmothers. They smile gently, kick me out of the house and remind me, one is not enough.

1 comment:

AB8WN said...

Ah, the joy of kids and the fun they can be. And yes, one is not enough.