Modern exercise, our over-all understanding of human existence, and the influx of new age and eastern philosophy give us a better understanding of a human being as a whole being. We are a connected creature, a melding of mind, body and soul. Blending the different parts of who we are is quite evident in our attempts to deepen our relationship with the natural world.
In few areas of living is the attempt to naturalize and re-meld psyche flesh and soul as with the art of child birth. La Leche league spent 70 years elevating breast feeding to an area of importance that I now find myself spending more time comforting those who have tried and NOT done it, than encouraging people to try.
Having children seems to exacerbate womens desire to showcase this connection. The thing that disturbs mothers so much about breast feeding, or rather the lack of breast feeding is that their decision or inability to do it makes them feel broken. So many read long lectures on medical benefits, bonding benefits and of course the Mind/ Body connection of this vast WHO of motherhood that their inability due to nature or lifestyle makes them feel selfish. I have yet to talk to a selfish mother. I know they are out there, but they tend not to worry about their choices very much.
If breast feeding is so all fired important to feelings of wholeness and one-ness, than a greater problem still is the disjointed practices of birth. Natural birth, without pain relief and helping medications or proceedures is considered prefferable, even elevated. Nurse-midwives and other less invasive and more "mother nature" tuned birth practices are coming back into play. They are beautiful, direct and work in many cases.
I suspect that mine is not such a case. Baby birthing is not the problem. I am a healthy pregnant woman, but the practice of having contractions and pushing the baby out seems to elude my body. There is no connection between the proper production of chemicals and processes. If its such a crime to fail at breast feeding, then how big of a transgression is it to be inable to have a baby according to the proceedure manuals outlined in my pregnancy manual and my doctors practice guides?
Maybe its not such a transgression at all. The rate of people who died in child birth decreases with every new medical discovery. Pain relief, pitosin, and especially ceaserians are responsible for saving lives of so many woman and babies whom darwinian concepts, and the current view of birthing condemn to death. No offense meant to those who believe in the betterment of genetics through weeding out bad genes, but I would prefer to be naturally selected to live. If a couple shots of pitosin will fill in for what nature forgot to give me, then Thank God.
Mind and body may connect, they may be important to take with you into labor and delivery, and they may be intrinsic in breast feeding or simply connecting to the world around you. Its all a good idea, and its amazing what people accomplish when totally in tuned with themselves. That doesn't mean the ultra natural or the uber-scientific is right for anyone. What worked for me will not work for ten other women, or even for me this pregnancy. If you really want to foster a mind body connection, perhaps the most important thing is to look inside yourself. If it works, and you get the job done, you are one with the process.
Wrong is when you quit trying.
Speaking of which, anyone have any suggestions for starting labor? How about potty training a stubborn busy two year old? Getting your husband to put his dirty socks in the laundry?